A client describes, in one of our early sessions, the strange experience of being estranged from a sibling and discovering, months later, that an entire story had been written about her in her absence. She hadn't been consulted. She hadn't even known the story existed...
A client tells me about the moment she realized her diagnosis had stopped being hers. It took her nearly fifteen years and a rotating cast of providers to get an accurate one in the first place — mislabeled first with anxiety, then bipolar, then borderline personality...
A client sits across from me describing, for the third session in a row, a symptom his physicians can’t explain. Chest tightness that isn’t cardiac. Stomach pain that isn’t gastrointestinal. A jaw he’s been told he clenches in his sleep so hard...
When you're a psychotherapist, you learn quickly that the people who most often end up in my office aren't often "the problem." They are "sin eaters" — a role with roots stretching back to the Old Testament scapegoat, the goat sent into the wilderness on Yom...
Complete control over anything is illusory. Our version of humanoid is around 285,000 years old, give or take. For most of that span, we were not alone. As recently as 40,000 years or so ago, multiple species of humans were alive on this planet at the same time —...
So this is a little broad and loaded. In my clinical work as a psychotherapist and sex therapist, I’m often asked to, “Meet people where they’re at.” Now that’s Tri-faceted, with many sub-facets depending on context 1) Biological,...
A client sits across from me describing, for the third session in a row, a symptom his physicians can’t explain. Chest tightness that isn’t cardiac. Stomach pain that isn’t gastrointestinal. A jaw he’s been told he clenches in his sleep so hard...
Ok…. So my grandmother never had long hair, and no one ever said she wasn't "lady like." Hair is just hair. It doesn't equate to gender. I get frustrated when I hear folx wanting me, or others, to have long hair or short hair, shave or not shave armpits, shave or not...
Being non-monosexual (liking more than one type of human) has been confusing for a lot of folx in my life. Inherently being queer is going to be and is a minority group in every species that lives in a binary structure. Monosexuals at times, have such a difficult time...
I find this topic fascinating for many reasons. I have training in gender and sex therapy. Intrinsically, identity work comes into play with most of the lovely humans I help. At least in the west, it appears most identities are heavily steeped in gender as an origin....
A client tells me about the moment she realized her diagnosis had stopped being hers. It took her nearly fifteen years and a rotating cast of providers to get an accurate one in the first place — mislabeled first with anxiety, then bipolar, then borderline personality...
A couple comes in for their first session, and within the first ten minutes, one partner says it plainly: "I think she might be a narcissist." He describes a familiar list — she doesn't seem to notice when he's upset unless he says so directly. She can talk for twenty...
Flying Monkeys and the Smear Campaign: Recognizing the Architecture of Narcissistic Abuse A client tells me, early in our work together, that no one believes her. Not fully. Her friends have started giving her a certain look when she brings up her ex-partner — polite,...
A couple comes in for their first session, and within the first ten minutes, one partner says it plainly: "I think she might be a narcissist." He describes a familiar list — she doesn't seem to notice when he's upset unless he says so directly. She can talk for twenty...
A client comes to me at forty-one with a diagnostic history longer than her résumé. Generalized anxiety at nineteen. A brief, uncertain flirtation with a bipolar II label at twenty-four, dropped when the mood stabilizer did nothing. Borderline personality disorder at...
The Thing No One Will Say in the Room La Salles, or wherever you like. A couple across from me. They have been having the same argument for years, and it has worn a groove so deep that neither of them has to steer anymore — the car finds it on its own. The dishwasher....
A client describes, in one of our early sessions, the strange experience of being estranged from a sibling and discovering, months later, that an entire story had been written about her in her absence. She hadn't been consulted. She hadn't even known the story existed...
A client tells me about the moment she realized her diagnosis had stopped being hers. It took her nearly fifteen years and a rotating cast of providers to get an accurate one in the first place — mislabeled first with anxiety, then bipolar, then borderline personality...
Flying Monkeys and the Smear Campaign: Recognizing the Architecture of Narcissistic Abuse A client tells me, early in our work together, that no one believes her. Not fully. Her friends have started giving her a certain look when she brings up her ex-partner — polite,...
When you're a psychotherapist, you learn quickly that the people who most often end up in my office aren't often "the problem." They are "sin eaters" — a role with roots stretching back to the Old Testament scapegoat, the goat sent into the wilderness on Yom...
The EQ Timeline: How Relationships Actually Unfold Finding love — or any relational substance, really — is the ticket. But that's after the honeymoon period, the infatuation period, typically 2 to 6 months. You'll know you've crossed out of it when you begin to notice...
Complete control over anything is illusory. Our version of humanoid is around 285,000 years old, give or take. For most of that span, we were not alone. As recently as 40,000 years or so ago, multiple species of humans were alive on this planet at the same time —...
In a world where convenience often trumps understanding, the narratives surrounding ableism reveal a troubling truth. The weaponization of diagnoses not only distorts reality but also undermines the voices of those who need to be heard. This dynamic creates a cycle of mistrust and isolation, where the very traits that define an individual become tools for dismissal rather than avenues for empathy. It’s crucial to challenge these narratives, to recognize the humanity behind the labels, and to advocate for a society that values authenticity over convenience. By dismantling the stigma associated with mental health diagnoses, we can begin to foster genuine connections and support systems that uplift rather than isolate.
Understanding the nuanced differences between autistic traits and narcissistic behaviors is crucial in fostering healthier relationships. Many individuals on the autism spectrum experience a unique emotional landscape that can be misinterpreted by those unfamiliar with their communication styles. This often leads to misunderstandings where genuine emotional responses are mistaken for self-centeredness. By recognizing the distinct ways in which autistic individuals express empathy and process emotions, we can create a more compassionate dialogue around neurodiversity. It’s essential to approach these discussions with an open mind, acknowledging that behaviors perceived as aloofness may stem from a different neurological wiring rather than a lack of care or concern.
Understanding the intricate dynamics of smear campaigns can empower individuals to reclaim their narratives. By recognizing the patterns of manipulation and the roles played by flying monkeys, clients can learn to navigate their social environments with clarity. This awareness transforms the experience from one of personal shame to a strategic understanding of external forces at play. It is crucial to help clients see that their worth is not defined by the narratives imposed upon them. Instead, they can cultivate resilience and assert their truth amidst the chaos. This journey of recognition and healing is not just about survival; it’s about thriving in the aftermath of relational turbulence.
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